Omen




dream, dream, dream
it's just you and your heart know what you have in your deep sleeping
nobody could erase or distract and chase it away. tho, foggy bushes woods i see a house, not just once not just twice.
no man's home, breezing cold breath that reminds how sneaky is a gaze.
with a knitted winter neckerchief we got from our warm home at that tropical land.
stare to the sparkling dust above south ocean, i keep an eye to the entire land.

Pemikiran Pra-ego masyarakat Islam Modern Indonesia


Ada materi pelajaran Sejarah Kebudayaan Islam dulu yang sangat jelas masih saya ingat sampai sekarang. Setelah sepeninggalnya Rasulullah Saw dan selesainya masa kepemimpinan Khulafaur Rasyidin, Bani Umayyah dst adalah pemegang amanat kepemimpinan umat Islam. Lalu kenapa umat Islam bisa sampai berpencar (bukan terpisah) menjadi sedemikian rupa hingga seperti sekarang? Bani Umayyah tak berlangsung lama hingga akhirnya kesatuan umat Islam pada saat itu sangat kacau balau dikarenakan fitnah yang berhebus didalam kepemimpinan dan persaudaraan sesama pemimpin Islam. Karena peperangan saudara sesama muslim tidak bisa dielakkan meskipun semua memiliki pemikiran untuk mencari yang terbaik bagi ummat dan meyakini Allah meridhoi cara kepemimpinannya. Selain daripada itu, ada banyak pemikiran-pemikiran yang mulai berkembang dan tidak semua umat atau sesama pemimpin memahami hal tsb dan mengakibatkan waspada meningkat untuk lebih mempercayai kepemimpinan lainnya. 1438 Hijriah, Umat Islam melebur didalam modernitas (ilmu dan teknologi yang berkembang melalui pemikiran ilmuwan islam dan non-islam merenovasi setiap titik-titik dunia lama) dengan segala pencapaian, cara kepemimpinan yang baru dan masalah ummat yang tiada hentinya. Semua tetap meyakini Allah dzat yang akan menuntun kita kepada hal kebaikan dan kita akan selalu memerangi keburukan di sisi lainnya. Islam, bukan hanya sekedar Indonesia.

Islam bukan hanya sekedar perdebatan sengit Jonru dan Akbar Faisal mengenai siapa yang paling benar dan siapa yang telah memutar balikkan kebenaran sambil keduanya yakin dan menyebut-nyebut nama Allah. Islam adalah tentang pemikiran dan pendalaman berpikir untuk mencapai kedamaian tentang kenapa Allah Dzat yang paling Agung menjadikannya agama yang Haq. Tentang bagaimana kita menyampaikan bahwa agama yang kita yakini adalah kebenaran dan pembawa kebaikan. Tentang bagaimana kita melakukan banyak hal yang membawa pencerahan kepada ummat lainnya. Pemimpin adalah manusia. Manusia yang dapat melakukan banyak kesalahan. Apakah kita merindui Rasulullah? Beliau tentunya akan sangat sedih melihat wajah kita hari ini, saya. Seharusnya lah kita kembali kepada Allah dan merenungi, akan jadi muslim apakah kita dalam hampir 15 abad kejayaannya. Saling berseteru dan menganggap pemahaman diri yang paling benarkah? Atau mengkaji dan mencari pemahaman sudah sejauh mana kita pergi meninggalkan landasan?

"Dan (ingatlah) tatkala Tuhan engkau berkata kepada Malaikat : Sesungguhnya Aku hendak menjadikan di bumi seorang khalifah. Berkata mereka : Apakah Engkau hendak menjadikan padanya orang yang merusak di dalam nya dan menumpahkan darah, padahal kami bertasbih dengan memuji Engkau dan memuliakan Engkau ? Dia berkata : Sesungguhnya Aku lebih mengetahui apa yang tidak kamu ketahui."

Linkin Park Has Path, Our Path!


It’s been a year, more than one year. This sad news delivers me to write my blog post again.
Chester Bennington is passed away. Yea, definitely internet brought it to me. But why I feel like, all my world is falling down. Down to the bottom of my past, my highschool hell stories, my bestfriend and my first love. 18 hours after the news spread. Here, me one of your people, no, you’re and your guys, Chester Bennington, Michael Kenji Shinoda, Rob Bourdon, Joseph Hahn, and brad Delson, this message is for you guys. Please holding on and thank you always with my regardfulness.
Mental illness? That’s not a surprise for become a centre attention from another centre attention people, or want to be centre attention people, that compete to anyone lives by entertainment world with huge famousity and others problem surrounded, I hate to read comments by people who can’t put any respect to other side’s condition. I decide to not browse all post about him, I just sad. I just want to know the cronology,  that put off my phone. I don’t need their fucking opinions on you. It’s just me and you guys right now.
To pace away this shockness, I play an old movie. Disconnected? Ah yea, that’s so me. That’s why you guys help me to keeping my path. The very hot day after school, your hybrid theory and Meteora. Do you guys know how I find you? One gloomy day I regret myself to choose agree enter the school I ain’t want, I just do it to my Dad. I’m so regretting my school live and I hate for become the target of bullying. Yes, I’ve been bullied by the kids in my school because ‘I’m different’. That day, the pirated illegally compact disk seller at the street near my school. That one song  hinted all over radio, when I still don’t understand about how easily download it songs later. I ‘m looking for your cassette, I save my money and we run over to cassette stores, me and my friend, we escape school, we escape extended classes. To buy cassette, the next day I play your cassette every day until about countless turn to flip-flop the cassette side.  Your scream and that blah-blah-blah rapping (my mom said) is noisy all over the house, remembering I’m the only daughter in the house, it’s categorized as abnormal. And yea indeed, I have some family issues too. I can’t deny myself that I was a teenager who needs more attention from family and running for a direction. Communication never be my right to speak out inside the house, where my thinking considered as not important. Until now.  There, I met also my bestfriend and my first love. There I start to have something finally I can dream on. I want to be focus pass my highschool life and made it extraordinary. I, this so-called delinquent student, who in fact being bullied and almost alone, slow at study and nervous to talk to my crush; have the boldness to get better.
Day by day, after that and also the college life. You start to change your genre, I don’t care. I’m willing to stay with you guys, though people say it’s stupid and you guys are confused and lose identity. It’s not. Music made by experience, all your lyric, the melody, rhythm,
comes as gift. You made it because it’s your message, your story. We choose you because we adore you. We are at the same path, you made us a clear line how we feel about our live. If you change your music and we stay, it means we’re still at the same path. Behold, please behold! Do it like you guys first met, like you guys first talk and decide to make what song it should be, into your album. I never met you directly, I never watch your concert, not a single one. My family is poor. Me too, broken.  Our connection is just songs. All people who choose you, all stay. Don’t regret life. You guys are bigger, the bigger leads.

Adore you always.

Chester Bennington.